Most of the times I feel about New Years like this:
But then instantly, I have a regret, a guilt for being so pessimistic and my thought turns to something like this:
I mean I have done it wrong, year after year, only trying, or rather barely trying to make things better, to improve myself. And year after year, I am barely floating above the level, but I am still there, trying. So why not this year too? (Not that I have a choice not to try)
So, I think and think more, which is what I am really a master at and decide that let what’s gone, go and welcome what wants to come. Instead of merging past, present and future, and struggling to barely keep up, I decide to just breathe. Peace is all I want, now. Lat year, had been too much of a roller coaster for me, nothing I could not handle, but given the chance I would have liked to dodge that bullet! But now all’s in the past, and I have never really looked up to New Years as I am looking up for this one. Nothing awaits me, not that I know of, but I am hoping against hope, that it would be a slightly better year than the last one.
So, I am really not fretting over my past, not worrying about my future, all I want to do right now is, live in the moment, hoping against all hopes that things will turn out as they should be. (Because clearly however much I kick around in the air some things are really not under my control).
So, wishing all the lovely people around here, a very peaceful and a bright new year.
PS: As I write this down, Mr. Coffee hater is persistently cooing at me, wanting all the attention that I was clearly devoting to my computer. And just as I take the shot below, he winks at me, flutters his wing, and soars away! The attention seeker that he is!! Ufff…
In case you don’t know who this person is who hates coffee; you can visit the link below: Mr. Coffee Hater- My New Friend!
Moushmi Radhanpara 
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